On the re-appearance of the OS X Java 6 Developer Preview

December 19, 2007 3:14 PM

SCENE: Somewhere deep in the bowels of 1 
Infinite Loop, Cupertino

        DEVELOPER

    Boss. The mailing-list has exploded 
    again. They're asking when Java 6 is 
    going to come out. This is really 
    starting to get out of hand.

        MANAGER

    Tell them we can't comment on future 
    releases, and get back to fixing 1.5 
    bugs.

        DEVELOPER

    I can't! They're not buying it any 
    more!

        MANAGER

    Well, release another 1.5 update 
    and make sure there's lots of stuff 
    in the release-notes to reassure 
    them that we're working on something.

        DEVELOPER

    We just did that. But because we 
    called  it "update 6" it got all their 
    hopes up.

        MANAGER

    Damn. What's the status of Java 6?

        DEVELOPER

    There's a lot of work left to do. We 
    need more reso...

        MANAGER

    I know. We need more resources. I'll 
    just go upstairs and convince the
    brass that Java 6 is more important 
    than the iPhone SDK. Then I'll ride
    back down here on my FLYING PIG.

    So what is the status of Java 6? Can 
    we put out a new DP in the next twelve 
    hours?

        DEVELOPER

    We've fixed a couple of bugs. It 
    works on Leopard now! But I'm 
    not sure...

        MANAGER

    Does it compile?

      
        DEVELOPER

    ...yes

        MANAGER

    Does the installer work?

        DEVELOPER

    ...yes, but...

        MANAGER

    But what? It compiles, it installs, 
    let's bang it up on ADC today and 
    be done with it!

        DEVELOPER

    Well... I installed the alpha 
    yesterday. The next morning my 
    Mac wouldn't boot,  my hard drive 
    was overwritten with random 
    bytes, and my cat was dead.

    ...come to think of it, that last one 
    might be a coincidence.

        MANAGER

    That, my friend, is what disclaimers 
    are for.

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