The KLF: The Manual: (How to have a number one the easy way). Annoying lack of capitalisation from the original:

be ready to ride the big dipper of the mixed metaphor. be ready to dip your hands in the lucky bag of life, gather the storm clouds of fantasy and anoint your own genius. because it is only by following the clear and concise instructions contained in this book that you can realise your childish fantasies of having a number one hit single in the official u.k. top 40 thus guaranteeing you a place forever in the sacred annals of pop history.

other than achieving a number one hit single we offer you nothing else. there will be no endless wealth. fame will flicker and fade and sex will still be a problem. what was once yours for a few days will now enter the public domain.