Gnome Swapping

by Charles Miller on August 23, 2002

There was a story on the news about people stealing garden gnomes. Now call me a wild-eyed anarchist, but I think this is a good thing for gnomes and people alike.

One of the sad things about being a garden gnome would be the monotony. You're generally stuck in your spot, looking in the same direction, surrounded by the same people. Sure, they were all interesting when you moved in, but you've all been standing in the same place for years, and you quickly run out of conversation. And there you are, still, covered in moss, dangling the same fucking fishing-rod in the same fucking pond all day, all night. It's torture, plain and simple! It would be a favour to these gnomes to give them a change of scenery!

But, at the same time, it would be unfair to completely deprive a garden of a gnome. What the world needs is... Gnome Swapping™!

Gnomes could swap gardens overnight. Change suburbs. Make new friends. Dangle their rods in whole new ponds. A gnome for a gnome, and for each gnome a new home. No gnome left unturned.

I see a great need.

Previously: A Better Java Learning Environment

Next: Sat, 24 Aug 2002 07:49:29 GMT