Things I Learned Watching Revenge of the Sith

May 29, 2005 10:48 AM

Following on from Adam Fields, I'd like to add (with lots of spoilers):

  • In a galaxy far, far away, missiles that release funny little robots that try to eat your spaceship are considered far more useful than missiles that, say, explode.
  • Maybe the Jedi temple should just spend less time on that flashy lightsaber stuff, and more time teaching novices to “Use the Brain.”
  • Dragonball Z shows up in the weirdest places these days: “Dooku! My power-level has doubled since we last fought!”
  • Given how only one person made the connection between a pregnant senator and the guy who was living with her, we can assume that people a long, long time ago haven't yet worked out where babies come from.
  • Clones always inherit the New Zealand accent of their parent genetic material.
  • Two wookies looking sideways at each other and moaning could be considered homoerotic, but only if it were possible to tell what sex a wookie is.
  • Jedi: from tortured conscience to baby-killer in sixty seconds.
  • Jedi also go from ‘impossible to kill’ to ‘deer in headlights’ whenever it's convenient, so to ensure success in killing Jedi just make sure you plan to do it in a way that advances the plot.
  • Using the cutesy sci-fi term ‘younglings’ over the perfectly servicable English equivalent ‘children’ makes me far less sympathetic when they're slaughtered.
  • After defeating the man you loved as a brother in combat, the compassionate Jedi way is to leave him to burn alive rather than deliver the coup de grace.
  • A Jedi's power to be unaffected by the heat of several million tonnes of molten rock quite obviously resides in his feet.
  • ‘Because it would be cool’ is sufficient excuse for any abuse — no matter how flagrant — of continuity, the laws of physics, or just plain common sense.

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